Becoming a Mum
Thursday 7th of November 2013 | Category: Opinion | Written by: Kathryn CrawfordWhen we're pregnant people tell us we'll be all 'back to normal' once the baby is about 6 weeks old but that is very rarely the case. What is normal for one woman may be very far from normal for another!
For starters once you've had a baby your life will never return to the way it was pre-baby. A mum's life will be changed forever after she's had a baby - both emotionally, physically and socially. You are now responsible for another life, another being. Some new mums take it in their stride whereas others worry constantly whether they're 'doing it right' or not. As a young, free and single you may have been cool with everything, relaxed and laid-back but once all those hormones have been working on you for 40 weeks you may become a very different person.
From a physical point of view, the new mum has a 6 week check with her GP and it is at that point that she will hopefully be given the all clear that her body has healed inside. However if the new mum has gone through a more complicated birth like a caesarean, then there could still be a fair amount of post-operative pain at the 6 week mark. Other kinds of medical intervention like forceps and episiotomies can leave you with a lot of soreness and discomfort and everyone's skin heals differently of course too. If you're lucky, the backache you had during pregnancy will ease after your baby has been born but many mums are left with back-pain for a long time after the birth.
From an emotional standpoint, hormones can cause havoc. One minute you're up, the next minute you're down. You're excited and over the moon that you have a new baby but then it suddenly hits you that it's all up to you now and that weight of responsibility can drag some new mums down. That gorgeous cute little bundle of a newborn baby doesn't just lie there all sweet and gurgling all the time. Oh no, he obviously wakes in the night to be fed. That means your sleep is disturbed and a few nights of disturbed sleep can leave you shattered and make you feel like you're far less able to cope with the trails and tribulations of being a Mum.
If Dad's on the scene, the relationship between you and the baby's father will change - it's bound to. You have far less time for each other naturally and in some circumstances the partner may feel pushed-out. If he knows what to expect then he'll be prepared but if he's expecting everything to be 'back to normal' after 6 weeks then he might be confused if they're not. In lots of cultures, the new mum is waited-upon and looked after for 40 days but in our society you're lucky if you have one night in hospital before you're back home coping with the deluge of visitors day after day when you're meant to be trying to 'get over' the birth. In those 40 days, the new mum should really just be recovering from the birth and spending her time bonding with her baby and getting used to the idea of being a Mum.
Becoming a Mum is a massive transition in a woman's life and it takes time to get used to the idea - not just 6 weeks! But once you're into the swing of being a Mum, it's fantastic. They're only little babies for such a short time, so enjoy it!
About the author
Kathryn Crawford
I am a Mum (3 daughters and 2 step-sons) and also a Director and Editor of TheBabyWebsite.com.share this page with friends and family
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