Times they are a changing - do I parent differently to how I was raised?

Looking back on my childhood, I guess you could say that I do parent differently to how my parents raised me, but at the same time, I think my childhood is the basis from where I start, really. If I'm stuck, I think about what I used to do as a child, or what my mum used to do with me. I think a lot of these differences relate back to how things just naturally change with time.

I guess one of the biggest differences is that I feel that me and my partner do most of the childcare 50/50. My partner reduced his hours to look after Bubs twice a week when I went back to work. When I was brought up, my dad worked long hours, and sometimes worked away from home during the week. Whilst I have happy memories of holidays and weekends, I don't think he looked after me on his own regularly like my partner does with Bubs. I think that back then not many fathers took on a 'stay at home' role. They didn't get paternity leave and I think roles were seen as more traditional.

A big difference in my parenting is that I am bringing Bubs up as a vegetarian. I was brought up eating meat and I still enjoy eating meat. This has caused some hearty debate between me and my partner. Both sides of the family will tell us the benefits of either diet as it's the 'norm' for that side. However, as I was already making and eating veggie meals at home anyway, and I don't regularly eat that much meat at home, it has just been easier for us as a family for her to go veggie. It is one thing my partner feels strongly about, and as I don't really feel that strongly about meat, it just made sense. I think we will see in the future how things go, and if she wants to try meat I don't think we would stop her at all!

There are some differences too which I think comes with the era you are bringing up a child in. I have had phrases such as 'you will spoil your child if....' Said to me a few times, but I think that's just because people's beliefs are still sort of stuck in the era they brought children up in. If Bubs cries, I go to her as I feel this is the best way to comfort her, whereas others feel I'm making a rod for my own back. When I was little things such as smacking a child were not frowned upon like they are today, and I remember being threatened with a wooden spoon a few times! (Although the threat was never carried out). This is something I feel I do not want to do with Bubs.

When Bubs was 6 months old, we started baby led weaning. I think this is one issue that you can really see the difference between me and my parents! I think baby led weaning was a bit difficult to get their heads around initially although everyone we have talked to about it has been very supportive in their own way. Whereas we give Bubs bits of food that we eat in finger food sizes, and she picks and chooses what she wants to eat rather than us spoon feeding her, I know at times my parents have queried whether she would choke, or is she getting enough food. Like I say everyone has been supportive but a bit of spoon feeding goes on, I think it's because that's what people feel comfortable with. Bubs is very adaptable and will just go with the flow. I try and not get too get up about how she eats, as long as she is eating that's what matters, and she is very able to let you know if she doesn't like what's happening!

I think for me, having the internet, my blog, my twitter and all the friends I have met as a consequence, has been a bit difference to that of my mums experiences. I have information at the touch of a button whereas in 1983 my Mum didn't even have a phone in her house! I also always have people to talk to, to share my feelings with and to have this without having to leave the house at times has been a godsend. I have met some lovely people through blogging and I have also learnt a lot through people's experiences and support. I can't imagine what it was like to have a poorly baby and no one to ask, and no way to find out anything other than going to the phone box down the road to call for a doctor.

So, I think I do I parent differently from my parents, in that times change, technology develops and so naturally you do things differently. Some things will never change, such as the basics of changing a nappy or feeding a baby. It's how we are supported and how much information we have to make choices I think is the biggest difference nowadays. I just wonder what it'll be like in another 30 years time!

This article is a feature from the MUM.com Trusted Bloggers Club.

About the author

Emily G

I am a first time Mum, blogging and trying to figure it all out one cold cup of tea at a time. I love chocolate far too much, as well as writing poetry and reading books. I write honestly and openly about my life, I hope you enjoy!

Click here to read my full biography.

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